Jason Anthony--Amsterdam Angel: 2015

Mr. 19J

It finally happened. After thousands of flights in my lifetime a dream came true. I always hoped that I would be seated next to a sexy man. Well, on 13 October 2015, I did. We spent the night together with the always-wonderful service of KLM from New York to Amsterdam.

I was fortunate enough to spend a good chunk of a beautiful autumn in Europe working on my next book—drum roll—it’s title, I’m happy to announce is The Khat’s Mejou. It covers my time living in Africa and picks up where (shameless plug) Amsterdam Angel and The Reverie Bubble left off.

The flight was nearly full. I waited at the gate with the lowest priority along with five other standbys, to see if there was a seat for me. One-by-one the others smiled with relief as they received a ticket and made their way down the jet bridge.

Then it was my turn, and a seat was available! I had the option of a window or aisle. Window hands down for an overnight flight to sleep and not be bothered. I’m always thrilled with any seat as long as I get where I want to go and receiving 19K was no different.

As I scurried on the door soon closed behind me. Everyone was seated and ready to go. I approached row 19 and could see the head of a man sitting in the middle with an empty seat on each side. Once I saw the tall, sturdy, young man I became a bit nervous, both because he was so gorgeous to me and the fact that I would have to let him know he did not have the whole row to himself. He could not stretch his long, muscular legs out like I was sure he hoped. He would have to share, with me.

When I stopped at the row he looked up. He had the rugged, chiseled face of a man combined with the envy producing smooth skin of a boy. His big brown eyes I could have fallen into. His military style brown hair put me in a ‘Yes, Sir!’ mood. But my gaydar screamed straight, and he became someone to simply crush on.

“I’m in the window,” I said with an apologetic look.

He simply began to rise and move aside. He was slightly taller than me with broad shoulders and in his mid-twenties. It felt as if the whole plane was waiting for me so I quickly slipped into 19K and stuffed my big orange duffel bag underneath the seat in front of me.

Mr. 19J (in my fantasy the ‘J’ stood for Jason, natuurlijk--as in it was meant to be) sat back in his seat. I knew I was the last one on and that he could move to the aisle to give a bit more room for us both. But he didn’t. He stayed in his middle seat as I tried to get comfortable with my bag taking up most of my legroom. As the flight attendant came by to do their final check she informed Mr. 19J that he could move over to the aisle seat.

“I will, I watch the takeoff first,” he replied in broken English with a Russian accent.

Awe, I thought as the flight attendant smiled sweetly and glanced at me. I felt we both had the same thought that it was endearing Mr. 19J enjoyed something so simple that two flight attendants experience numerous times. My crush became more crushed. He was hot and sweet.

As the flight attendant left I looked to the window. It was a third closed and I instantly began to reach for it as he began to speak to ask me to open it before stopping once he realized I was. He nodded and slightly smiled. A moment of connection lasting seconds but I enjoyed every one, especially the smile and look into his eyes.

“You like to put your bag here,” he asked pointing underneath the aisle seat.

I accepted his kind offer and he moved it over. I figured we would move it to the middle seat once he slid into the aisle seat.

As the big blue 777 began racing down the runway I fully embraced the moment to share with Mr. 19J knowing now it was a thrill to him. With all sexual notions removed because of the simple facts that he was straight and I was in a relationship, the experience evolved to a schoolboy unrequited tenderness that I could both enjoy and feel safe in an innocent fantasy as the plane glided into the sun setting sky and we prepared to spend the night together.

Once in the air Mr. 19J moved to the aisle seat. I told him he could move my bag to the middle seat to give him room. But he said it was fine where it was. He suggested we could stretch out our legs toward the middle. It was so sweet to me. More crushing.

The flight attendant came by passing out headphones. They wrapped around the earlobes in a funny way and ‘clipped’ on. I noticed him look at them then glance over to me, not exactly sure how they went on. I made an obvious demonstration without him letting him know I knew he was looking.

He proceeded to watch a Marvel comic action flick. I was in the mood for romance. I choose a film where something develops between two people from a chance meeting and found a Dutch rom-com to practice my Dutch as well, as our meals came around.

Once supper was finished an announcement for duty free shopping came over the intercom. With his limited English Mr. 19J couldn’t quite make out everything and turned to me for explanation for what was happening. I, happily at his beck and call, explained what was said. His thanks sent another thrill through me that I was helpful to him. Even though it was one more moment lasting only seconds it was something to connect to my crush.

After the flight attendants were done with duty free I excused myself to change and brush my teeth. I fumbled through my bag in the aisle to find everything I needed before stuffing it back under the aisle seat.

When I returned I asked Mr. 19J if he was sure he didn’t want me to move my bag out from underneath his seat and into the middle. He assured me it was fine and that he would watch it. Crushing continued.

With the lights dimmed, I popped an Ambien, covered myself with the blanket, put my earplugs in and eye mask as Mr. 19J continued watching movies. I saw myself reflected in him at that age, traveling internationally, staying up all night watching movies. But I had reached an age where attempting to sleep is a must on an overnight flight.

But I tossed and turned and simply could not get comfortable or quality sleep knowing Mr. 19J was so near. Occasionally our legs brushed against each other as I shifted around. When it did it added precious seconds of more connecting to my crush and sent more thrills through me. But it also added to my inability to fall asleep. Occasionally I would subtly peek from beneath my eye mask for another glance at Mr. 19J to make sure he wasn’t a dream. But he was always still there, in an attractive spotlight from the illumination of his screen.

The puer aeternus in me began to play in my imagination—since he was not going to be my husband—I thought of Mr. 19J as my young, handsome, and brawny Russian bodyguard protecting and watching my bag and giving me space while defending any intruders into the row that wanted to snap a picture or ask for an autograph. It provided me some entertainment that substituted for sleep.

Upon landing he slid my bag to me. Like Pi, I had hoped for some sort of exchange, a good-bye, an, ‘enjoy Amsterdam’, or something acknowledging our night together. But there wasn’t, and like Richard Parker, there was no looking back as he exited the plane.

An occupational hazard for a writer, it was all in my head, and completely one sided. But it didn’t make it any less enjoyable as the dream fulfilled itself perfectly and was playfully imaginative with a great lead in the role! And as always thanks to KLM for a wonderful flight and service!

As fall comes to a close and the holidays approach, I wish you all a very joyous season and best wishes for a healthy and happy 2016

May your eternal boys and girls inside come forth with playfulness and imaginative fun!

XXX,

Jason

For my first Throwback Thursday I thought I’d take all of you braving the artic chill of winter back to a bliss-filled moment in the warm sun and water of summer. Hang in there spring is around the corner.

Sometimes we question if it's worth all the effort to escape for a few days with all the balls in life to juggle and everything that must be done. Last August brought me such hoops to jump through for an unknown experience. But that to me is adventure; and he is such a seductive paramour.

So what is the one moment you ask? Well it would defeat the purpose of why the one moment was worth everything that came before it…without knowing everything that came before it. So here goes.

In the airline industry seniority is everything. However, where you’re based determines the type of work trips you have to choose from. One of the most desired trips to work are the flights to Cancun with 2 and 3-day layovers…at a J.W. Marriott…on the beach. But they have always remained a unicorn to NYC crews.

But when a fellow co-worker based in Los Angeles came riding on my plane one day last June and the subject of Cancun arose she offered to pick one up then pass it to me. It was worth a shot.

Once our schedules were released, she contacted me and said she was awarded the trip I requested. But I had another trip assigned to me over the same days and would have to get rid of it before I could pick hers up--and that is not always easy. It created another hurdle that caused me to think twice whether it was worth it.

But when I found out one of my favorite co-workers—sweet, laughter filled Fay, a beautiful southern lady—was on the trip my heart gave a clear sign to trust that everything would work out; to believe that I would be on the jump seat next to her, as it evolved into the Cancun and Fay Dream.

My options were limited with what I had to work with to make it happen. Swapping with a trip that dropped my hours below the company’s monthly requirement, then add an extra trip to make it up. It was a perfect storm of conditions that all had to come together to work.

But it was Cancun…for 2 days and 2 nights…free hotel on the beach. For all the delays, diverted flights, and difficult guests, this was one perk of the job I felt long overdue for. The ‘glamorous’ part of the job the public believes is the norm, which it’s not.

Plus Fay and Jay would be together again. We could make up and sing our Fay and Jay songs as we once did when we flew together often. We’d use everything that rhymes with Fay and Jay—which we’ve found is quite a bit. It was like Cancun now singing to us,

Hey! Hey/Fay and Jay/Come stay/Come play/I’ll give you sun all day/What do you say?/Come play!/Fay and Jay!.

So I focused on it and it worked. We were going to Cancun. Then I began to imagine the dream growing bigger by bringing Derek along. He was long overdue to use his perk for sharing me with an industry that took us away from each other. Although that meant him having to fly stand-by, which is stress defined, we felt his chances were good. We a became positive trinity for each other, confident our hearts were leading us to Cancun for a special time as the Derek, Fay, and Jay Cancun dream blossomed.

I arrived at Fay’s apartment in LA the day before our Cancun trip. I was weary without much quality sleep after working a LA-NYC red-eye then riding right back to LA. But Fay helped re-fuel me with the idea of swimming with dolphins. She had a coupon and a contact at a company offering dolphin excursions on an island off the coast of Cancun. With the coupon the deal worked out to three for the price of two.

It was still expensive (Suze Orman would have denied me) and double for me because it was my 5-year anniversary gift to Derek, which was later in the month. The traditional gift, wood, and the modern, silverware, seemed boring. Besides in gay years five is like twenty. We needed something exciting. We needed a dolphin!

We woke early the next morning for the airport. I called Derek, as he prepared to leave for JFK and told him my sources said he should have a seat. Fingers crossed.

Before I knew it Fay and I were making sure custom forms were handed out and landing in Mexico. I was welcomed with the sound of a text coming in with Derek’s news, and smiled when I read he made it. He was outside the terminal building drinking margaritas.

All the juggling, planning, hoping, finger and toe crossing to arrive, and we all made it. After checking into the opulent hotel we refreshed and walked down to the beach with a drink to toast to Cancun. The clouds, sky, water, and sand provided an array of pastel colors that gradually darkened as the sun set behind us. But no, that was not The One Moment.

We hopped a crowded public bus and rode down through the modern tourists’ shopping area to the 'old' downtown and a quieter street where we found an authentic Mexican restaurant for some supper. We stopped in a local food market on the way back to the hotel for some groceries.

As we all I wandered around taking in a Mexican grocery store I noticed a sexy local man giving me long glances whenever our paths crossed. When we were in line, I looked up and he was right behind us. When Derek noticed him he whispered to me he was checking him out throughout the store.

“Me too!” I exclaimed.

“How confident of him to go fishing for two,” Derek replied.

“Well we’re both new meat in town.”

“But we already have a third for our Cancun threesome with a slippery and wet lover tomorrow. We need our rest.”

“Very sensible,” I replied as we laughed. We returned to our hotel for a restful sleep to energize us for meeting our dolphin.

We met Fay’s contact at ten the next morning near the ferry to Isla Mujeres—where our dolphin awaited. He helped us to the counter to make sure our coupon and discount were applied. We were thrilled when he told us we made a mistake in what was communicated to us about the price. It wasn’t 3 for the price of 2, but rather 3 for the price of 1! Plus he would give us the pictures that they normally charged $50 each, for free! Divided by 3, we each paid around $40 and saved hundreds!

We boarded the ferry that provided beer and soda for the forty-minute ride to the island. The sun was shining with 80-degree weather and a clear blue sky. After we docked, we were walking to shore and noticed a group of employees in wet suits with ‘Trainer’ on the back having a meeting on another dock.

“Whoa!” Derek exclaimed. “Did you see that?”

“See what?” Fay and I replied.

“That trainer! He’s gorgeous! Tall, tanned Adonis. I hope he’s our trainer,” he replied cheekily. I turned to look but didn't notice who he was talking about as got further away.

The two docks that stretched far into the ocean were connected by a third. Inside the enclosed area was where the interaction with the dolphins in their natural environment would occur.

Before we reached shore there was a sectioned off pen with a newborn dolphin and it’s mother. The baby was five days old and the facility said they would not know whether it was male or female for a number of weeks.

It was an amazing sight to see such a new creature to this Earth swimming along side its mother like it had been around for years. The baby seemed to burst with an electricity to be alive. After oohing and ahhing we walked on shore.

There was a large shaded area from a building containing many tables and chairs and a buffet that was part of the package. On both sides of it were pools to swim in and relax in the lounge chairs and hammocks.

We had a few hours before our turn with the dolphins; we indulged in some food and sun while we waited, and made videos swimming underwater with Fay's Go-Pro. Shortly before our turn, Derek and I sat in some chairs near the water and dock.

“Oh my God!” I exclaimed. “Look at this guy walking down the dock toward us. What a hunk!”

“That’s the one I was talking about!” Derek excitedly replied.

“I can see why! There is not an ounce of fat, and those chiseled features and deeply dark tan! He's like a Greek statue."

“So straight though.”

“Oh, so, so straight.”

He walked by with his dark sunglasses on with a Terminator expression.

“Let’s go cool off in the pool before the dolphin,” I said.

“Cool off from the sun or him?”

“Both.”

The three of us were a little bit late to the meeting spot for our dolphin swim.

By the time we found a life jacket and Crocs that fit all of the people in the next group had been assigned a trainer. When we approached the man that had put people into groups he was a bit surprised there were leftovers.

Just then The Greek Statue came in to talk to the man. And that’s when were matched up with the hunk. At first I thought we would have him all to ourselves, but then another three people came later then us and joined the group.

I looked at Derek, barely able to contain my excited squeal. He sent a slight smile, his eyes lit up. The Greek Statue spoke to come with him. Before he turned to walk, Derek stuck his hand out.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Derek.” The Statue stuck out his hand.

“Hercules," he replied.

Hercules! I thought. It couldn’t have been a more appropriate name. Derek looked back at me.

“Can you believe his name is Hercules?" I whispered under my breath, trying to hold in my glee.

We were given some instruction once we reached the dock before descending the staircase onto the metal platform that was four feet under the water. We walked down the platform past another group that had begun their experience. The water was warm, not giving one chill, but was still refreshing from the sun. Once in our area Hercules called over our dolphin and soon a beautiful creature popped his head up from the water and was within arms reach.

“This is Simba,” Hercules said.

He had Simba swim past each of us several times right side up and upside down so we could touch him and get a sense of being in the water with such a magnificent creature. As he did, Hercules relayed facts about dolphins from their habits to their physiology.

It was all very interesting, like the fact that a dolphins sonar could tell if a woman was pregnant, but I was concentrating on the thrill that every 30 seconds a dolphin was swimming past me. I wanted to obtain a sense of Simba, not just his species. He felt so happy, and his presence made me happy.

But Hercules had shared that Simba was getting over a broken heart because the female he liked had chosen another dolphin. I could tell Hercules and Simba had a special bromance; Hercules had been protective of Simba's heart and made sure he was all right.

My heart went out to Simba when I heard this and I just wanted to give him some love, because in the few minutes he had already given me so much of an experience. But I felt Simba found healing in interacting and being around humans who were elated to be near him.

After learning several commands, the six of us did each one as our next interaction with Simba. We gave the command for him to touch our raised hand with his nose, lay in our arms, grab both of his flippers, and get a kiss. All for the cameraman shooting us from the dock.

Afterward Hercules instructed us to swim out into the water, two at a time, on opposite sides of each other. For the next trick, I had a kickboard and as I treaded water Hercules shouted if I was ready.

“Yes!” I replied as I positioned myself on the board with my legs together and waited.

Soon I felt Simba’s nose where my feet met. He tried to push me forward but needed to find the right spot first, tickling me all the while. I separated my feet slightly and he quickly choose the center of my right foot. Once he felt secure we were connected, he started swimming faster, propelling me with a wake, back to Derek, Fay, and Hercules. The fact that this six-foot creature was pushing me encompassed my being and intimately connected us.

But it was the next trick that really cemented my awe for him. When I was in position again, I held my right had to my chest and stretched my left out, ecstatic to know Simba would again come from behind. When he appeared on my left he was upside down. I quickly grabbed my left hand to his right fin and my right hand to his left fin. Then I laid on top of him, my body supported by his, as I rode him back to the others.

It was impossible for anyone to be anywhere but in the moment when something like that happens, and I was no exception. Deeply embedded in the now I felt oneness with the being and Mother Nature. But that was not The One Moment.

The One Moment came when our time with Simba was coming to an end. Back on the platform, we had a bit of time leftover because we were such a small group. Hercules continued with dolphin facts as Simba swam past us and bobbed up to Hercules for a fish from the fanny pack he wore. It was during one of these times that Simba popped his head up right in front of Derek and I then stayed there for a moment.

For the entire time that we interacted with Simba, every time I saw his eyes they were squinted. But now his eye was completely open staring directly at me. I became so excited; I wanted to make sure Derek saw as the others listened to Hercules. But I didn’t want to look away for a second.

“Look!” I said for Derek to hear. “He’s looking right at us!”

“I see!” he replied.

Then, for about forty-some more seconds (some of the longest and most amazing moments in my life) we stood gazing into Simba’s eyes and he into ours. It was so intense and constant that I felt goose bumps mushroom all over my body in the warm water. It felt otherworldly, like the coolest kid in high school, the one that was popular because he was so nice and kind, was looking at us and saying.

“I like you guys.”

It also felt like a personal blessing for us. From the ancient Greeks who believed dolphins carried the souls of the dead to the afterlife, to the Christians believing they carried the dead to Christ to be reborn, to sailors across time who felt dolphins were a good omen, it was finally our time to experience their sacredness.
Simba was our omen and ambassador of dolphins who bestowed upon us the message and qualities of its spirit that they have represented throughout history to many cultures: to maintain peace and harmony, to remind us we are protected, to remember to be playful and joyful, to remember to resurrect ourselves for spiritual and personal growth, to have the inner strength to do so, and to cooperate with one another to live in peace and harmony.